*bilchyfizz__________________ i cant find myself
/Thursday, November 24, 2005
/15:45

leave me alone.. let me breathe. my mind is stuffed wit so many things. questions. answers. explanations. reasons. alibis. i dont know anythin anymore.. why. what. when. which. how.

history just repeated itself. did i bring this upon myself? why izzit that whenever i wanna do sumthin rite, i always ended up gettin maself into trouble. i dont wanna lie.. but i cnt tell the truth either. i dont wanna hurt.. but i end up hurting more.

i've moved on once before and never looked back. n i dont regret that. so shud i juz move on now and dont look back again? is that the rite thing to do?

i still lurve u..
but things are different between us now.
i noe u've changed fer the better
n u'd do anythin n evrythin fer me..
i noe u lurve me.
but d problem's not u..
its me.
i still lurve u
but i cnt lurve u like i used to
n i noe its hurting the both of us.
maybe dats y i cud do the thing s i did.
things that the old fiza cud never do to sumone she loves so much..
to sumone who means the world to her.
i noe i've hurt u deep..
its not a revenge. never was.
i cnt lurve u when i hate u so much..
n i end up hurting u.
i dont wanna hurt u anymore..
enough is enough.


just let me be.. leave me alone. im not worth it.

xxmuackxx
___________da story endz like this..




_____B I L C H Y_____

I'm shy. sensitive. gentle. patient.
I'm exuberant. lively. exhibitionist.
I hide the considerable depths of my character under a
cloak of frivolity.
Sometimes I make no sense.
Sometimes I'm perfect.
Sometimes I'm a mess.

Narcissist.
If I don't love me, who will?

I do not give myself easily and are sometimes accounted cold.
If I'm deceived my anger is terrible.
If disillusioned, I do not forgive.


Try figuring me out. You never can.
I am all extremes...



I.N.T.I.M.A.T.E.S.

LAF
ayu
bubz
eila
fad
fara
horny bitch
nad
ns
runn
shashi-mee
syafiq
syira
van
wan khai
yan han



h.u.s.h. ___ h.u.s.h.